A Joke to Start Your Day: The Jewish Talking Dog

Sol visits Dr. Bloom, the veterinarian, and says,
"My dog has a problem."

Dr. Bloom says, "So, tell me about the dog and the problem."

"It's a Jewish dog. His name is Irving and he can talk,"
says Sol...

"He can talk?" the doubting doctor asks.

"Watch this!" Sol points to the dog and commands:
"Irving , Fetch!"

Irving , the dog, begins to walk toward the door, then
turns around and says, "So why are you talking to me
like that? You always order me around like I'm nothing.
And you only call me when you want something. And
then you make me sleep on the floor, with my arthritis..
You give me this farkakteh food with all the salt and fat,
and you tell me it's a special diet. It tastes like dreck!
YOU should eat it yourself! And do you ever take me
for a decent walk? NO, it's out of the house, a short pish,
and right back home. Maybe if I could stretch out a little,
the sciatica wouldn't kill me so much! I should roll over
and play dead for real for all you care!"

Dr. Bloom is amazed, "This is remarkable! So, what's
the problem?"

Sol says, "He has a hearing problem! I said 'Fetch,'
not 'Kvetch!"