Jewish Humor Central is a daily publication to start your day with news of the Jewish world that's likely to produce a knowing smile and some Yiddishe nachas. It's also a collection of sources of Jewish humor--anything that brings a grin, chuckle, laugh, guffaw, or just a warm feeling to readers.
Our posts include jokes, satire, books, music, films, videos, food, Unbelievable But True, and In the News. Some are new, and some are classics. We post every morning, Sunday through Friday. Enjoy!
During
our week of Jewish humor lectures and comedy programs at the Berkshire
Hills Eisenberg Adult Vacation Center, we shared the role of guest
lecturer with Mark Levy, a
California-based performer and teacher of Jewish music for 30 years at
temples, synagogues, JCCs, elder hostels and other Jewish groups. Mark's
classes and lecture topics include Fiddlers on the Stage! - Ten Jewish
Violinists, Music of the Bible, Klezmer 101, The Classics from Rossi to
Bernstein, Songs of the Jewish Labor Movement, and A Century of Jewish
Humor in America. We
got Mark to sit on the lawn next to Lake Copake and tell us some of his
favorite jokes. We captured a few and we've been sharing them with you. Here's the setup for today's joke: A guy goes to the doctor and gets some tests done. The doctor comes out with a chart in about 45 minutes. And then... Enjoy! (A SPECIAL NOTE FOR NEW EMAIL SUBSCRIBERS:
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Back in May we
posted the pilot
episode of Soon By You, a new web comedy series that depicts the
joys and challenges of Orthodox Jewish dating for young professional singles in
New York City. In July we posted the second episode.
Your reactions
to the comedy were very positive, and so we have been watching for new episodes
to show up. This week the third episode, The Shabbat Meal, was released,
and we're sharing it with you today.
In the pilot
episode titled The Setup, a rabbinical student named David accepts a
blind date at a restaurant in Manhattan’s Upper East Side. While there
he accidentally sits down across from Sarah Feldman, a free-spirited artist
with whom he instantly connects, but that's not his date. Through a series of
different events he’s eventually led to the “right” girl,
also named Sarah, a larger than life superficial-type character, who is so
caught up with ordering food and herself to actually catch the nuances and
humor of his excuses that led him to be late.
This situation
leads to a not-so-typical romantic encounter with David and Sarah F, who take
short breaks from their respective dates to meet at the back of the restaurant,
where they dream up mural ideas and finish each other’s sentences. It’s an
example of a matchmakers' worst nightmare and how chemistry leads the way to a
potential match. Get ready to cry, laugh, be amused, and, watch the
"fun" filled life of Orthodox dating.
In the second
episode, The Follow Up, David loses Sarah F's phone number. With the
help of his roommate, Z, he is willing to do anything to find her. Two new
characters are introduced and we spend more time with the original four
characters.
In the third
and latest episode, David goes to great lengths to see Sarah F again. Meanwhile
Ben faces his first conflict between work and faith.
Our guess is
that we will be following these characters through a series of romantic
adventures, that is if the filmmakers find sources of funds to continue
producing the series.
Enjoy!
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We're heading into our first Shabbat back home after spending a month of holidays in Jerusalem. It's been a great month and we've enjoyed sharing some tastes of this great city with you.
We're working our way back to our mix of jokes, music, fun, unusual news items, Jewish Traces in Unexpected Places and Unexpected Traces in Jewish Places, but with Shabbat starting tonight, we'll share just one more Taste of Jerusalem. This is a taste of Kabbalat Shabbat, not the usual Friday night evening service, but a bonus afternoon musical pre-Shabbat service that's been taking place each week at First Station Jerusalem, the outdoor mall, event and dining center that opened in 2013. Residents and tourists alike come here to celebrate a musical welcome to Shabbat. For the secular population, it's their Shabbat experience, and for the observant it's a pleasant way to set the stage for traditional services and Shabbat dinner at nightfall. Enjoy! (A SPECIAL NOTE FOR NEW EMAIL SUBSCRIBERS:
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We hope you had a joyful month of holidays. Now that Rosh Hashana, Yom Kippur, and Sukkot are behind us, we're back to our usual mix of jokes and funny happenings around the world.
Mondays are reserved for a Joke to Start the Week, Fridays for a Shabbat-related post, and Thursdays for reaching back in time for a classic comedy post. The other days? Whatever we think is funny or nachas-producing. On this Throwback Thursday we're reaching back to an episode of The Johnny Carson Show when Johnny interviewed Alan King and Alan reminisced about the time his son had difficulty learning the Haftorah for his Bar Mitzvah. Enjoy! (A SPECIAL NOTE FOR NEW EMAIL SUBSCRIBERS:
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Every
year, tens of thousands of Israelis and Christian believers from around the
world participate in the annual Jerusalem March, a festive parade that takes
place in the middle of the week-long Sukkot
holiday (the Feast of Tabernacles).
It
begins in the afternoon and participants include representative groups from
different countries and organizations, dance ensembles, street artists,
marching bands, IDF soldiers and others.
The
Jerusalem March has evolved since its founding in 1955 when it was a four day
march around the time of Passover that was attended by a small number of IDF
soldiers and a few dozen local civilians.
Following
the founding of the Christian Embassy in Jerusalem in 1980, Christian believers
began joining the march and over time it has become a tradition for thousands
of Christians from around the world to participate while holding banners
showing their love for the Jewish people and the State of Israel, wishing
locals a happy holiday and giving bystanders little trinkets, such as flags
from their home countries, and candies.
We
went to the finish line in Gan Sacher to record some of the marchers in their
native costumes carrying the flags of their countries and singing songs in
support of Israel.
Enjoy!
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Originating
over 200 years ago in Munich, Germany, the annual Oktoberfest is best
known as a celebration of beer, food, and music that’s
gradually spread to all corners of the globe.
This year, Jerusalem had its first full-scale Oktoberfest celebration during Sukkot at the First Station, with everything from traditional beer tents and live music to Bavarian beer and food.
During Chol Hamoed Sukkot, Jerusalemites came out in large numbers to sit at the long, wooden, communal tables, to
enjoy some giant beers, sausages and pretzels and listen to live music. Join us for another in our series of video Tastes of Jerusalem as we shop, drink, enjoy the music, and mingle with the residents and visitors to this lively city during the holiday season. Tonight is Shemini Atzeret and Simchat Torah in Israel, both days wrapped into one. The diaspora observes two days of Yom Tov on Monday and Tuesday. We'll be back blogging again on Wednesday. Enjoy and Chag Sameach! (A SPECIAL NOTE FOR NEW EMAIL SUBSCRIBERS:
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When it comes to spontaneous street theatre in Jerusalem, Zion Square, at the bottom of Ben Yehuda Street is ground zero. And during the intermediate days (Chol Hamoed) of Sukkot and Pesach, Zion Square is where some of the best singers and performers show up to give the passing crowds a good show. This week we have had quite a show, and we captured performances that we'll be happy to share with you in the coming days, even after the Sukkot holiday is over. The video below of Adon Olam, the concluding song of the Shabbat morning service, turned into a spontaneous combination of music and dance this week. We know who the guitarist and violinist are, but the lady in gray who suddenly joined the duo with an unexpected dance routine remains a mystery to us. The singer/guitarist and violinist, known as The Rabbi and Gypsy Lady, are regular performers in Kikar
Zion (Zion Square) and also on stage in clubs and theaters around
Israel. Rabbi Tomer Peretz's day job
is as a teacher of Torah and Talmud, but he is also a singer, composer
and guitarist. His musical partner is Alexandra
Kanarit. This "Gypsy Lady" is a violinist and composer from the
Ukraine. Enjoy and Shabbat shalom! (A SPECIAL NOTE FOR NEW EMAIL SUBSCRIBERS:
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Sukkot
is an amazing time of year to be in Jerusalem, and that's where we are this
week. With most schools closed for the entire week, the streets and parks are
teeming with children and their parents attending the special events that have
been planned to keep them in a happy holiday mood.
During this Sukkot week we'll be running a series of blog posts to share this
mood with you and give you a taste of Jerusalem.
Today we'll start with a few minutes that we captured on the first intermediate
day of Sukkot at an evening street fair in the German Colony. Every year the art fair, with street theater
performances, exhibits, music concerts, central stages, art workshops, food
stands, caricaturists, outdoor musicians, public dances, exhibitions and more
is held all along Derech Beit Lechem.
You'll be with us as we walk past vendors of clothing, housewares, and gifts,
food stands, and groups of performers including singers and giant papier mache
puppets.
Enjoy! (A SPECIAL NOTE FOR NEW EMAIL
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We've
been following the Canadian comedy duo of Jamie Elman and Eli Batalion
as they travel the world in search of funny situtations involving
Yiddish culture, language, and food. Their web series, YidLife Crisis, was recently nominated for a Canadian Screen Award for best original digital media series. They
have taken their act on the road, performing a live version of their
show in Krakow, Tel Aviv, Toronto, Montreal, Los Angeles and Birmingham,
England. The
pair has also received a prestigious grant from the Natan Fund and have
created a series of five travelogues featuring their impressions of Tel
Aviv. In February we posted their funny Valentine’s Day episode guest staring Mayim Bialik.
We've been touring London with Jamie and Eli in two blog posts in the last two months. Now we're back with part 2 of their Britishkayt series: Think Yiddish, Drink British.
In this episode Jamie and Eli talk with Leon Silver of the East London Central Synagogue about changing demographics, the Jewish origin of Fish & Chips, and good Scotch whisky. Enjoy!
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YOU CLICK ON THE PLAY BUTTON IN THE VIDEO IMAGE TO START THE VIDEO.)
When the holiday videos start to arrive, we're sure that the boys of Boys Town Jerusalem are busy singing and creating their musical contribution to the yom tov spirit. We have posted their videos for Passover, Rosh Hashana, and Chanukah. This year Boys Town Jerusalem has put together a special Sukkot Song -
Vesamachta Bechagecha (Be happy on your holidays).
On this holiday we leave the comfort and security of our homes and go into the sukkah, showing our faith in God for protection and sustenance. In Jerusalem this week, we see the sukkot going up on every street and on the sidewalks next to the restaurants that are constructing them for the convenience of their customers. Established
in 1948, Boys Town Jerusalem has become one of the
country's largest and most respected educational institutions since its establishment in 1948 to provide a home and education for young immigrants to the
newly-created State of Israel. We hope you enjoy the video. We'll be in shul tomorrow for the first day of Sukkot in Jerusalem and we'll be back with more Jewish humor on Wednesday.
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Just Published: The Kustanowitz Kronikle - 35 Years of Purim Parody
Every Purim for the past 35 years we have published a Purim parody edition of The Kustanowitz Kronikle, covering virtually every aspect of Jewish life, and including parodies of hundreds of popular movies. This year we decided to retire the series and capture all the fun in a book that's just been published and is available at Amazon.com. It has every Purim issue of The Kustanowitz Kronikle from 1988 through 2022 in a full-color, full-size paperback book with hilarious headline stories and parody movie picks. Here are a few examples: TRUMP, NETANYAHU SWAP ROLES, COUNTRIES; NEW TALMUD VOLUME "VOTIN" FOUND IN IRAQ; JOINS "FRESSIN", "NAPPIN", TANTZEN","PATCHEN"; "JUDAICARE" PROGRAM PLANNED TO ENSURE THAT ALL JEWS HAVE SYNAGOGUE MEMBERSHIP; RABBIS CREATE TALMUD AMERICANI; NEW LAWS EXTEND HALACHA TO THANKSGIVING AND JULY 4; JEWISH ORGANIZATIONS WORLDWIDE UNITE TO STOP GLOBAL WARMING; FOCUS ON REDUCING HOT AIR; RABBIS TO REQUIRE SHECHITA FOR MANY FRUITS AND VEGETABLES
Jewish Humor Central Staff
Publisher and Editor-in-Chief:
Al Kustanowitz Food and Wine Editor:
Aviva Weinberg Israel Food and Wine Consultant Penina Kustanowitz Reporter and Photographer:
Meyer Berkowitz Reporter Phyllis Flancbaum
Now You Can Book Program and Lecture Dates for 2024 and 2025 in Person and Via ZOOM
Now is the time to book our Jewish humor programs and lectures for your 2024 and 2025 events in person and via ZOOM anywhere in the world. Book any of our 22 popular programs including "The Great Jewish Comedians", “Israel is a Funny Country”, and "Jewish Traces in Unexpected Places." Click above for details and videos. To book a program with Al, e-mail: dan@hudakonhollywood.com
"Jewish Traces in Unexpected Places" is now available on Amazon.com in paperback and Kindle editions
This book presents 150 anecdotes and associated video clips that reveal the myriad ways that Jewish culture, religion, humor, music, song, and dance have found expression in parts of the world that, at first glance, might not seem supportive of Jewish Life. It includes 50 videos of Hava Nagila being performed from Texas to Thailand, from India to Iran, and from Buenos Aires to British Columbia. Also highlighted are 34 international versions of Hevenu Shalom Aleichem, Adon Olam, Abanibi, and Tumbalalaika. Whether you’re reading the print version and typing in the video URLs or reading the e-book version and clicking on the links, you’ll have access to 150 video clips totaling more than 10 hours of video. Enjoy!
"Israel is a Funny Country" is now available on Amazon.com in paperback and Kindle editions
This book explores the multifaceted nature of humor in Israel, some of which is intentional and some of which is unintentional. Either way, the quirks of Israeli life contribute to making that life interesting and fulfilling. In the pages of this volume, we take a look at humorous slices of Israeli life, Israeli comedy, satire and parody, funny TV commercials, unusual stories about food, surprising rabbinic bans on daily activities, simchas as they can only be celebrated in Israel, and endearing aspects of Israeli culture. There are more than 120 anecdotes and links to video clips totaling more than six hours of video. We hope that these anecdotes and video clips give you a new and different insight into life in Israel, and encourage you to join in the fun by planning a visit to the land flowing with milk and honey.
Now is the time to book our Jewish Humor Shows and Lectures in person or on ZOOM.
Bring Al's Jewish humor lectures and comedy programs with the funniest videos on the Internet to your community and your synagogue, club, JCC, organization or private event in person or via ZOOM. We're taking reservations now for 2024 and 2025 dates in your community. Click above for details. To book a program with Al, e-mail: dan@hudakonhollywood.com.
Now Open: The Jewish Humor Central Gift Shop
Jewish Humor Central logo merchandise is now available. Click on the image above to see the complete collection -- More than 100 items from tote bags, baseball caps, mugs, aprons, drinkware, T-shirts and sweatshirts, to pajamas and underwear.
The Best of Jewish Humor Central - Now Available in eBook and Paperback at Amazon.com
The Best of Jewish Humor Central - More than 400 video clips, including music and comedy videos for all the Jewish holidays. View them on Your PC, Mac, Kindle Fire, iPad, iPhone, iTouch, Android Tablet and Smartphone. Click on the image above to peek inside and download a free sample. And now, a paperback edition for anyone who prefers a traditional book and doesn't mind typing the URLs instead of clicking on them.
About the Publisher and Editor-in-Chief
A long-term devotee of Jewish humor, Al Kustanowitz has been collecting and sharing it even before there was an internet. In 2009, after a 36-year career at IBM managing new technology projects, he founded Jewish Humor Central (jewishhumorcentral.com. Through the blog he brings a daily dose of fun and positive energy to readers who would otherwise start the day reading news that is often drab, dreary, and depressing (subscribing is free). He has published 12 books on humor based on his more than 4,000 blog postings, each of which includes a video clip and his commentary.
He has presented more than 100 programs in South Florida and the Northeast on topics that include the great comedians and entertainers of the 20th century, funniest moments in film and television, flash mobs around the world, and composers and lyricists of the Great American Songbook.
He earned his bachelor's and master's degrees from the City University of New York and taught computer science courses at the Courant Institute of Mathematical Sciences at New York University. He is a member of the Advisory Board of the International Association of Yiddish Clubs.
You can contact Al via email at akustan@gmail.com.
Israel’s Tenth Trial
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by R. Eliezer Simcha Weisz In this unprecedented hour of trial, Israel
stands at a historic crossroads facing a perilous moment, waging battle on
eight fr...
A Friend Indeed
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[image: Dry Bones cartoon, Trump, MAGA, President, Jerusalem, Embassy,
America, Huckabee,]
Welcome Ambassador Huckabee!
* * * And *IT'S TIME FOR YOU TO MAK...
Thoughts on the Haggadah by Rabbi Eli Teitelbaum
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[image: Story 375601404]
We just recently were able to find the latest version of my fathers, Rabbi
Eli Teitelbaum Z”L, thoughts on the Haggadah and conve...
Hamantaschen: The Symbolism behind Purim Cookies
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Purim is a celebration of masquerade, Mishloach Manot, Hamantaschen and
book of Esther reading. Every Jewish holiday focuses on a special dish and
the tria...
Taking the Shuk to the Next Level
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Anyone who has spent any time on my blog, or just getting to know me, knows
how much I love Jerusalem’s famous outdoor market, Shuk Machane Yehuda.
I’ve ...
Kettlebell Training Massachusetts
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In April 2006, legislation was passed requiring all residents in
Massachusetts specializes in assisting Massachusetts residents who have
been put on exhi...
A chat with some protesters…
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Originally posted on don of all trades:
Hi protesters, it’s me, Don. Do you remember me? No? I’m a police officer.
We’ve met before. Excuse me? Did you say...
Trayf of the Week: Bacon Jam
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Just when you thought it was safe to eat your bagels in mixed company,
comes this devilish concoction. Next time a Goyishe friend offers you a
shmear, mak...