Jewish Humor Central is a daily publication to start your day with news of the Jewish world that's likely to produce a knowing smile and some Yiddishe nachas. It's also a collection of sources of Jewish humor--anything that brings a grin, chuckle, laugh, guffaw, or just a warm feeling to readers.
Our posts include jokes, satire, books, music, films, videos, food, Unbelievable But True, and In the News. Some are new, and some are classics. We post every morning, Sunday through Friday. Enjoy!
Two weeks ago on the holiday of Shavuot we read the Ten Commandments in shul. Most of us are familiar with the wording of these precepts in Hebrew and in English. But what about Yiddish?
In the Forverts' series "Yiddish Word of the Day", Rukhl Schaechter shows us how to say "Ten Commandments" in Yiddish and some expressions relating to them.
Schaechter, who was appointed the new editor of the Forverts in 2016, is
the first woman to helm the paper in its 119-year history, its first
editor to have been born in the United States, and likely its first editor
who is shomeret Shabbat.
We posted the
first
of this series in May 2020. Now that the Forverts is continuing the
series, we are continuing to share some of the words and phrases as a regular feature of
Jewish Humor Central.
Enjoy!
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Today we welcome another Shabbat with Shir LaMaalot, as sung by Berry Sakharof and 400 combat soldiers from the Israel Defense Forces. It was recorded earlier this month in Jerusalem at the National Library of Israel.
Berry Sakharof is an Israeli rock guitarist, singer, songwriter and producer who is
popular and critically acclaimed. He is often referred to as "the
prince" or "the prince of Israeli rock".
Enjoy, and Shabbat shalom!
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Totie
Fields was born Sophie Feldman in Hartford, Connecticut. According to
Wikipedia, she started singing in Boston clubs while still in high
school, taking the stage name of Totie Fields. The name "Totie" was a
childhood nickname, a baby-talk pronunciation of the name "Sophie" Fields
gained fame during the 1960s and 1970s. Ed Sullivan gave Fields her
first big break when he booked her on his show after seeing her perform
at the Copacabana in New York. She made multiple appearances on The Ed Sullivan Show, The Mike Douglas Show, and The Merv Griffin Show, as well as a fifth season episode of Here's Lucy starring Lucille Ball. Here's a video clip of Totie singing Put on a Happy Face from Bye Bye Birdie to Ed Sullivan on his variety show in 1966. Enjoy! (A SPECIAL NOTE FOR NEW EMAIL SUBSCRIBERS:
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Candid Camera
was a popular and long-running American hidden camera reality
television series. Versions of the show appeared on television from 1948
until 2014. Originally created and produced by Allen Funt, it often featured practical jokes, and initially began on radio as The Candid Microphone on June 28, 1947.
The show involved concealed cameras filming ordinary people being
confronted with unusual situations, sometimes involving trick props,
such as a desk with drawers that pop open when one is closed or a car
with a hidden extra gas tank. When the joke was revealed, victims were
told the show's catchphrase, "Smile, you're on Candid Camera." The catchphrase became a song with music and lyrics by Sid Ramin.
Today
we're sharing a classic episode from 1966 in which a voice in an automatic photo machine prompted people to strike candid poses with different emotions.
Enjoy!
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Zehavit
Rosenbloom is a mom with seven children who is performing standup
comedy and recording videos for Jewish audiences. She has created many
Jewish characters including ultra religious Rebbetzins, secular
Israelis, and El Al representatives who put passengers through intensive
interrogations before letting them board planes.
She
calls her comedy routines Zeya Comedy and we plan to share some more of her
sketches in future Jewish Humor Central posts. Today Zehavit is back with another impersonation of Revital -- a nosy, annoying El Al flight attendant in action.
Enjoy!
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It's another Monday and time for another Joke to Start the Week. Today Mickey Greenblatt is back with another good one.
Marshal (Mickey) Greenblatt received degrees from Columbia (BA and BS in Flight Sciences), a DC from Von Karman Institute (1963) and his PhD from Princeton in Aerospace Sciences. He worked as a researcher for NASA and the Naval Research Laboratory.
With four other scientists, he founded Fusion Systems Corporation, which invented microwave-powered UV lamps for drying coatings. He founded and served on the boards of technology companies and is active in volunteer work. He served on the executive committee of the Jewish Council for the Aging of Greater Washington for many years.
Mickey
also loves Jewish jokes and sent us this one to share with you. Here's
the setup: I went to see my doctor for my annual checkup. While he was working through everything I asked him "How do you decide when an older person is ready for the nursing home?"
And then...
Enjoy!
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Welcome to the ultimate guide to common Yiddish names and how to pronounce them!
In this video, Esther Mendlowitz explores some popular names that cross between Yiddish culture and the world. She provides the correct pronunciations and spelling of each name Whether you're curious about your own name in Yiddish or just interested in the language, this video is for you.
Enjoy!
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Greg Nogradi is a most highly appraised cantor of his generation, both
by experts and audiences. At the same time, Cantor Nogradi boasts one of
the most significant voices ever introduced in Jewish Music.
Born into
an Ashkenazi family, Cantor Greg Nogradi was already recognized for his
compelling dramatic tenor voice and passionate performance style during
his university years both in Jerusalem and in Budapest. Therefore, all
roads led to the vocal class of Liszt Ferenc Academy of Music in
Budapest and Music Academy Stuttgart for the young graduate in cultural
management.
After winning three major international competitions, Cantor
Nogradi found himself in the Verona Arena from one day to another, and
subsequently sang five new leading roles annually at various opera
theaters of the world until the turn of the millennium.
After serving
six years as the cantor of the Frankel Synagogue in Budapest, Cantor
Nogradi was elected Europe’s Number one cantorial voice at the European
Cantors Convention.
In this video Cantor Nogradi sings Ein Keloheinu in a concert in the Dohany Street Synagogue, the largest synagogue in Europe, seating 3,000 people.
Enjoy, and Shabbat shalom!
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Milk and Honey was the first Broadway musical by composer and lyricist Jerry Herman. It was a hit in 1961, and Herman went on to show business fame with his later creations, Hello Dolly, Mame, and La Cage aux Folles in 1964, 1966, and 1983.
The story of Milk and Honey centers on a busload of lonely American widows hoping to catch husbands while touring Israel and is set against the backdrop of the country's struggle for recognition as an independent nation.
One of the standout songs from Milk and Honey was Shalom, which became popular as a stand alone song. Here is a rendition by Sergio Franchi on the Ed Sullivan Show in 1963.
Enjoy!
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Candid
Camera
was an American hidden camera/practical joke reality television series
created and produced by Allen Funt, which initially began on radio as
The Candid Microphone on June 28, 1947.
After a series of theatrical
film shorts, also titled Candid Microphone,
Funt's concept came to television on August 10, 1948, and continued
into the 1970s. The show involved concealing cameras filming ordinary people being
confronted with unusual situations, sometimes involving trick props,
such as a desk with drawers that pop open when one is closed or a car
with a hidden extra gas tank. When the joke was revealed, victims would
be told the show's catchphrase, "Smile, you're on Candid Camera."
Peter
Funt joined the show professionally in 1987 when he became a co-host
with
his father. During this time the show was being broadcast on the CBS
television network. In 1993, Allen Funt had a serious stroke, from which
he never fully recovered. This required Peter to host the show
full-time.
The
show went through a few revivals. During his time on the show Peter was
a producer, host and acted on the show. He also produced and hosted
over 200 episodes.
This
classic episode first aired in 2002. Free samples are great, but what would you do if you were offered a sample of cheese nicely displayed on the end of a toothpick and then you discovered that it was a used toothpick?
Enjoy!
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Zehavit
Rosenbloom is a mom with seven children who is performing standup
comedy and recording videos for Jewish audiences. She has created many
Jewish characters including ultra religious Rebbetzins, secular
Israelis, and El Al representatives who put passengers through intensive
interrogations before letting them board planes.
She
calls her comedy routines Zeya Comedy and we plan to share some of her
sketches in future Jewish Humor Central posts. Today we're sharing another mock airport interrogation of a visitor to Israel by an annoying and very inquisitive airline agent.
Enjoy!
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It's another Monday and time for another Joke to Start the Week. This week we're posting another joke from Dr. Jay Orlikoff, a retired dentist from Centereach, New York, a community on Long
Island in Suffolk County.
After
a distinguished and meritorious dental career, he is shifting his focus
to telling and posting jokes on YouTube. We were fortunate to find some
of his jokes and we're sharing one of the family-friendly ones with you
today.
Here's
the setup: A really rude, nasty woman steals a can of peaches from a supermarket and she sneaks out of the store with it. A cop had observed her and he said "I saw what you did." And then...
Enjoy!
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The Yiddish folk love song Tumbalalaika
originated in Eastern Europe in the 19th century, but its exact origin
is hard to pinpoint. That hasn't prevented it from being sung and played
over and over, not only in places where Yiddish songs are sung, but
just about everywhere in the world, in vocal and instrumental versions,
in cabarets and in the movies.
Just as we have followed the songs Hava Nagila, Adon Olam, Hevenu Shalom Aleichem, and Abanibi
as they took different forms as interpreted by a wide variety of
singers, musicians, and dancers, we're continuing the series today that
we started back in 2012, sharing our 24th version of this
universal courting and love
song.
The San Francisco Yiddish Combo was formed by accident when a love of Klezmer music collided with their collective backgrounds in every genre except Klezmer. Now they have embarked on a journey around the world to present their own unique blend of everything that is Klezmer, mixed with years of experience in the jazz, blues, folk, and even hip hop world. This group performs Klezmer for the 21st century!
Made up of classically trained musicians who enjoy stretching musical boundaries, the SFYC is led by cellist Rebecca Roudman who has fronted groups all over the world bringing her virtuosic and fiery playing to stages from China to Italy and beyond.
Enjoy!
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Just Published: The Kustanowitz Kronikle - 35 Years of Purim Parody
Every Purim for the past 35 years we have published a Purim parody edition of The Kustanowitz Kronikle, covering virtually every aspect of Jewish life, and including parodies of hundreds of popular movies. This year we decided to retire the series and capture all the fun in a book that's just been published and is available at Amazon.com. It has every Purim issue of The Kustanowitz Kronikle from 1988 through 2022 in a full-color, full-size paperback book with hilarious headline stories and parody movie picks. Here are a few examples: TRUMP, NETANYAHU SWAP ROLES, COUNTRIES; NEW TALMUD VOLUME "VOTIN" FOUND IN IRAQ; JOINS "FRESSIN", "NAPPIN", TANTZEN","PATCHEN"; "JUDAICARE" PROGRAM PLANNED TO ENSURE THAT ALL JEWS HAVE SYNAGOGUE MEMBERSHIP; RABBIS CREATE TALMUD AMERICANI; NEW LAWS EXTEND HALACHA TO THANKSGIVING AND JULY 4; JEWISH ORGANIZATIONS WORLDWIDE UNITE TO STOP GLOBAL WARMING; FOCUS ON REDUCING HOT AIR; RABBIS TO REQUIRE SHECHITA FOR MANY FRUITS AND VEGETABLES
Jewish Humor Central Staff
Publisher and Editor-in-Chief:
Al Kustanowitz Food and Wine Editor:
Aviva Weinberg Israel Food and Wine Consultant Penina Kustanowitz Reporter and Photographer:
Meyer Berkowitz Reporter Phyllis Flancbaum
Now You Can Book Program and Lecture Dates for 2024 and 2025 in Person and Via ZOOM
Now is the time to book our Jewish humor programs and lectures for your 2024 and 2025 events in person and via ZOOM anywhere in the world. Book any of our 22 popular programs including "The Great Jewish Comedians", “Israel is a Funny Country”, and "Jewish Traces in Unexpected Places." Click above for details and videos. To book a program with Al, e-mail: dan@hudakonhollywood.com
"Jewish Traces in Unexpected Places" is now available on Amazon.com in paperback and Kindle editions
This book presents 150 anecdotes and associated video clips that reveal the myriad ways that Jewish culture, religion, humor, music, song, and dance have found expression in parts of the world that, at first glance, might not seem supportive of Jewish Life. It includes 50 videos of Hava Nagila being performed from Texas to Thailand, from India to Iran, and from Buenos Aires to British Columbia. Also highlighted are 34 international versions of Hevenu Shalom Aleichem, Adon Olam, Abanibi, and Tumbalalaika. Whether you’re reading the print version and typing in the video URLs or reading the e-book version and clicking on the links, you’ll have access to 150 video clips totaling more than 10 hours of video. Enjoy!
"Israel is a Funny Country" is now available on Amazon.com in paperback and Kindle editions
This book explores the multifaceted nature of humor in Israel, some of which is intentional and some of which is unintentional. Either way, the quirks of Israeli life contribute to making that life interesting and fulfilling. In the pages of this volume, we take a look at humorous slices of Israeli life, Israeli comedy, satire and parody, funny TV commercials, unusual stories about food, surprising rabbinic bans on daily activities, simchas as they can only be celebrated in Israel, and endearing aspects of Israeli culture. There are more than 120 anecdotes and links to video clips totaling more than six hours of video. We hope that these anecdotes and video clips give you a new and different insight into life in Israel, and encourage you to join in the fun by planning a visit to the land flowing with milk and honey.
Now is the time to book our Jewish Humor Shows and Lectures in person or on ZOOM.
Bring Al's Jewish humor lectures and comedy programs with the funniest videos on the Internet to your community and your synagogue, club, JCC, organization or private event in person or via ZOOM. We're taking reservations now for 2024 and 2025 dates in your community. Click above for details. To book a program with Al, e-mail: dan@hudakonhollywood.com.
Now Open: The Jewish Humor Central Gift Shop
Jewish Humor Central logo merchandise is now available. Click on the image above to see the complete collection -- More than 100 items from tote bags, baseball caps, mugs, aprons, drinkware, T-shirts and sweatshirts, to pajamas and underwear.
The Best of Jewish Humor Central - Now Available in eBook and Paperback at Amazon.com
The Best of Jewish Humor Central - More than 400 video clips, including music and comedy videos for all the Jewish holidays. View them on Your PC, Mac, Kindle Fire, iPad, iPhone, iTouch, Android Tablet and Smartphone. Click on the image above to peek inside and download a free sample. And now, a paperback edition for anyone who prefers a traditional book and doesn't mind typing the URLs instead of clicking on them.
About the Publisher and Editor-in-Chief
A long-term devotee of Jewish humor, Al Kustanowitz has been collecting and sharing it even before there was an internet. In 2009, after a 36-year career at IBM managing new technology projects, he founded Jewish Humor Central (jewishhumorcentral.com. Through the blog he brings a daily dose of fun and positive energy to readers who would otherwise start the day reading news that is often drab, dreary, and depressing (subscribing is free). He has published 12 books on humor based on his more than 4,000 blog postings, each of which includes a video clip and his commentary.
He has presented more than 100 programs in South Florida and the Northeast on topics that include the great comedians and entertainers of the 20th century, funniest moments in film and television, flash mobs around the world, and composers and lyricists of the Great American Songbook.
He earned his bachelor's and master's degrees from the City University of New York and taught computer science courses at the Courant Institute of Mathematical Sciences at New York University. He is a member of the Advisory Board of the International Association of Yiddish Clubs.
You can contact Al via email at akustan@gmail.com.
The New Syria
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[image: Dry Bones cartoon, Syria, Israel, Hamas, Julani, Rebels, HTS,
Assad, Terrorists,]
Does Democracy have a Chance?
* * * Please support DRY BONES (thr...
Daily Reyd
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Available on Amazon and at your local bookstores • Tactical menorahs: A new
first for the IDF Rabbinate • Community is sustaining – New study sheds
light o...
Kosher Sushi Primer For New Sushi Foodies
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In kosher restaurants across the US (and around the world), sushi has
become a staple, particularly over the last 25 years, with various styles
adapted t...
Thoughts on the Haggadah by Rabbi Eli Teitelbaum
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[image: Story 375601404]
We just recently were able to find the latest version of my fathers, Rabbi
Eli Teitelbaum Z”L, thoughts on the Haggadah and conve...
Hamantaschen: The Symbolism behind Purim Cookies
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Purim is a celebration of masquerade, Mishloach Manot, Hamantaschen and
book of Esther reading. Every Jewish holiday focuses on a special dish and
the tria...
Thank you for your support!
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Thank you very much for supporting our work at The Muqata. We appreciate
your contribution and hope to be able to keep bringing you the most up to
date ...
Boarding School Massachusetts
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Every fall the Massachusetts Health Connector provides information
concerning the public higher education institutions and designed to prevent
offenders ...
A chat with some protesters…
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Originally posted on don of all trades:
Hi protesters, it’s me, Don. Do you remember me? No? I’m a police officer.
We’ve met before. Excuse me? Did you say...
Jerusalem Walking Tours for Sukkot
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It is about time that I brought back my “Jerusalem: Meet Jerusalem” walking
tour series. And while I am nearing completion on a few new ones that I
hope to...
Trayf of the Week: Bacon Jam
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Just when you thought it was safe to eat your bagels in mixed company,
comes this devilish concoction. Next time a Goyishe friend offers you a
shmear, mak...
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